Christmas is a time for sharing, therefore I am sharing with you some of my most favourite Christmas songs and renditions.

Special Mention: DMX – Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer

This deserves special first mention because DMX! and DMX singing Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer and knowing ALL the words, and the beat!

1. Pentatonix – Mary Did You Know & WinterWonderland/Don’t Worry Be Happy/

I thank my girl Daks of ThirdWorldProfashional for introducing Pentatonix into my life for my life is richer. They are talented and their Christmas album is on repeat on my Spotify! And oh Scott! He’s just…

2. O Holy Night 

This scene, this scene in Best Man Holiday will forever have me snorklling in the deepest sea of my feels. I cry ALLAHTIME whenever I watch this movie because on the deepest level I know what it is like to lose a really close friend.

3.  Boney M – Mary’s Boy Child

Childhood memories come flooding back whenever I see this video – be it the end of year Christmas nativity plays at my primary school or being with my siblings and us just acting like a band singing this in our living room.

4.  Destiny’s Child – 8 Days of Christmas

I miss Destiny’s Child.

5. Mariah Carey – All I Want For Christmas

Mariah has been going through a lot lately, she has been having bad vocal moments, however it does not take away the fact that this song right here is THE Christmas song period.

This Christmas I spend it with my loved ones there will be eating, games, dancing to Beyonce 7/11(actually the 7/11 dancing happens daily in my home as exercise obvs. as I need to master how to flex my glut muscles). What are your favourite Christmas songs? What are you doing for Christmas?

You can stream Pentatonix: That’s Christmas to Me here, and buy it on iTunes here. It is definitely an album worth having!

I like ratchet things with my bougie friends. Not to be confused with I partake in ratchet activities, but rather my ratchet indulgence is geared towards Reality TV – the more ratchet it is, the probability of me watching is more than likely high. Another that I do indulge in is ratchet rap. Ratchet rap is a source of entertainment, the bars have you either laughing, wondering what in the world they are trying to say, moments of ‘enlightment’ and sometimes it influence pop culture.

Chris Rock’s movie Top 5 was released in the US on 14th December, Chris’s character lists his Top 5 GOAT rappers, Issa Rae of Awkward Black Girl then listed her Top 5 ratchet rappers and so as some-one who is a avid fan of ratchet rap I decided to share my own Top 5

5. 2Chainz

2Chainz is the king of ratchet rap at the moment and actually has fans, loyal ones for that matter not Beyhive crazy but he has them.

4. T-Pain

Linda listen, when T-Pain first came on the scene, it was the time I used to be out partying with the best of them, so in a weird way nostalgia feels like I’m not loyal for when T-Pain would come on  it was just like, decorum who art thou..I knowst not decorum because you were there snapping and what not?

3. Rasheeda

Well, this Georgia Peach right is damn straight ratchet and we have seen some of the ratchetness in her life.

2. Trina

The name of the record company is called ‘Slip-n-Slide’ The Baddest Chick in the game. For just having been with French Montana I feel like Trina should go to number one.

1. Plies

I feel that this above interview just sums it all up really.

Special Mention – Rick Ross

The only reason that bae Rick Ross is on this list is because of his shout out to all the pear which helped in his weight loss journey. And for the reason that the internet has no chill – so all his comments are usually littered with pear smileys!

If you would like to list your own Top 5 Rappers, you can do so here http://mytopfive.topfivemovie.com/

Fastforward to 4.00mark to start video

Watch brilliant, fearless storytellers Lena Dunham (Girls), Mindy Kaling (The Mindy Project, The Office), Jenji Kohan (Orange Is the New Black, Weeds), and Kristen Wiig (Bridesmaids, Saturday Night Live) with New Yorker critic Emily Nussbaum as they discuss antiheroes and archetypes, using humor to crash through boundaries, as well as how far their art will go to tell the truth.

The fascinating range of three-dimensional female characters on film and television these days suggests a sea change in the cultural zeitgeist. They’re smart, sexual, funny, and flawed; they upend expectations, thwart our sympathies, and complicate the way we talk about gender roles.

This is definitely a must watch for all creative story-tellers.

I could never have predicted: I’d be this happy. There was a time when getting up in the morning was hard. I thought I couldn’t run a company, have a public persona, balance motherhood and do it all well.

The key to happiness is: Not being concerned with what other people think about you. If I believe the good things, then I have to believe the bad. So I have to stop believing any of it.

You will never regret: Being fearful but doing something anyway. The key isto just keep moving.

But you might wish you had: Been kinder to yourself. I am very competitiveand have a type A personality. I wish I had said to myself that it’s also important to spend time working out. Now I know I need to be kind to my body.

The biggest risk I ever took: I don’t consider anything I’ve done to be a risk, and it’s important to think of it that way. I only do things I feel fairly definite about.

Never be impressed by: Someone’s money, clothes, car or man. Looking at those outer things, you don’t know anything about what a person’s really going through.

I hope people will remember me most for: Being a daughter, sister, mother and friend. And for writing crazy, entertaining characters who talked about stuff that mattered.

This article was  sourced from Essence.com and originally published in the February 2015 issue of ESSENCE Magazine, on newsstands now!

‘Tis 2015 and if you’re looking for some inspiration and new Instagrammers to follow, fret not for we are here to share the Editor in Chic’s 7 Must follow Instagrammers who feed your soul with inspiration, fashion style, business advice, laughs and also topics to get you talking.

1. Mindy Kaling/ @mindykaling

First off – Mindy’s Instagram profile has ‘new money’..love her for that. I absolutely adore Mindy, from when I first watched her in The Office US, to then reading ‘Is Everyone Hanging Out WithOut Me’ (this book is one of the funniest books I’ve read and definitely a must have in one’s library) to The Mindy Project. Mindy’s Instagram account is very Mindy – it has fashion, she’s  the ‘not in your face’ fashion blogger who inspires your wardrobe, she shares pictures of her fellow cast members as well as the writers.

2. Ty Hunter / @tytryone

He’s famously known as the man that dresses King Bey, but actually Ty should be known as one of the most inspirational, scratch that Ty is the most inspirational and motivational person I follow on Instagram. It is like having a conversation with the most down to earth person on this earth, who despite who they work with has zero airs and graces but is there for you.

3. Fros and Beaus @frosandbeaus

This account is pro love for your hair and pro love…combining the love of our natural locks – and the different variants we choose to rock our hair and the love of love..this is a FAB account to follow, you get your hair inspiration and a dose of love.

4. Taraji P Henson @tarajiphenson

If you’re a fan on the new Fox show ‘Empire’, then it’s great to follow Taraji as she also serves some Cookie realness on her page. Taraji has mastered how to use Instagram for the show and interact with the fans of the show – and will gladly post funny Cookie/Empire memes too. Fox have definitely wised up and understand the power of interacting with their fans, from  having an Empire playlist on Spotify (because that original music on the show is GREAT), having a standalone blog devoted to giving the background story on each of the Lyons and Empire staff and on their site with each episode they have a section devoted to Cookie’s Closet sharing the items she wore with episode (is it just me, or is anyone else enjoying how consistent they are with how Cookie’s wardrobe is changing from her release to prison to now? Great job to the show’s stylist on that one”).

5. Jay Z / @officials_c_

I’m inclined to think that not many people are actually aware that Mr Shawn Carter is on Instagram and posts regularly. Most of his posts are actually Mr & Mrs Carter and sometimes Baby Blue…it’s great to see this side of Jigga, and as I love Mr Carter, I want you all to appreciate the love he has for his wife too!

6. Demetria Lucas D’Oyley / @aBelleinbk

A Belle In Brooklyn has been a blog I always followed and enjoyed, then to watching Demetria on the reality TV show ‘Blood, Sweat and Heels’ and also religiously following and enjoying her ASKFM questions. Demetria works hard, she is one blogger with great reader/follower interaction and also by moving her Ask Belle from ASKFM to her own website where she would have control and ownership of it all (because you all know that though you might have a huge following on any Social Media platform, if that platform were to shut down, so would your content therefore it is a must to have your own website that you have control and actually do own.), she goes to show she has mastered the art of the business side of the work she does. And I do live for the #AskBelle questions chile!

7. Myleik Teele / @myleik 

Myleik Teele is my friend and business mentor in my head, she is the CEO (Chief Experience Officer) of the subscription company Curl Box. Myleik also has great customer/follower interaction on her Instagram page, she shares business and personal advice with her #MYTaughtYou, in essence Myleik inspires me in so many ways…her Instagram all in all shows being a 30something entrepreneur who workouts, hang out with friends, travels solo, shares glimpses of her personal life and encourages others to go forth and conquer!

So share with us who are your favourite 7 Instagram accounts and why.

PhotoCredits: Instagram.com

‘If music be the food of love, play on; Give me excess of it’ Act 1, Scene 1, Twelfth Night by the Bard. 

I love music, the most cherished gifts I’ve ever received have been music and as it is Friday the 13th February, I thought hey, let me share my Top 7 Great Love Songs.

1. Love Hangover – Diana Ross 

Ah, if there’s a cure for this,I don’t want it. If there’s a remedy
I’ll run from it. Think about it all the time,Never let it out of my mind ‘Cause I love you. I’ve got the sweetest hangover, I don’t wanna get over
Sweetest hangover.

2. Love is You – Chrisette Michele 

Love is kind when the world is cold, Love stays strong when the fight gets old. Love’s a shoulder to lean on,Love is you. Love’s like the water when the well runs dry quench my thirst, keep me alive, Just need one sip baby Love is you.

3. Loving You – Minnie Riperton

Lovin’ you is easy cause you’re beautiful. Makin’ love with you is all I wanna do. Lovin’ you is more than just a dream come true and everything that I do is out of lovin’ you

4. Vision of Love – Mariah 

I had a vision of love and it was all that you’ve given to me. Prayed through the nights felt so alone. Suffered from alienation carried the weight on my own had to be strong. So I believed and now I know I’ve succeded in finding the place I conceived. I had a vision of love and it was all that you’ve given to me

5. K-Ci & Jojo – All My Life

You’re all that I ever known, when you smile on your face all I see is a glow,
You picked me up when I was down and I hope that you feel the same way too, Yes I pray that you do love me too

6. Into Yami – Ringo Madlingozi & Tuku

Zvose zvangu, mdiwa ndezvako

7. Amor – Viviane Ndour ft Philippe Monteiro 

Ma bo ten ki sabe, Ma amor ka ta vontera, Kuando ki nù ‘sta apaixonado,Bo ta fina sempre pa comprende, Ma bo ten ki sabe

So share with us your top 7 love songs and let’s all celebrate the love in the air.

PS: If you’d like to gift some-one the greatest gift of all – a love mixtape, you actually can do that via my absolute favourite  and go to website – Not On The HighStreet and create your very own mixtape from just £20>> here . If you’re reading this it’s not too late #AubreyGraham.

“THE STREETS AIN’T MADE FOR EVERYONE, THAT’S WHY THEY MADE SIDEWALKS”

I’m here to confess that I am a fan of the greatest TV show of the moment (not only based on how I feel but the weekly growing statistics prove just what a great show it is)- Empire. I also find myself humming to Drip, Drop because that song won’t get out of my head.

Empire is a soap opera, to put simply imagine Dallas meets Glee – the antics of a soap opera put together with original music performed by the characters on the show that formula leads to addictive entertainment. Empire follows Lucious Lyons a former rapper turned into business mogul with a record label ‘Empire’, his ex-wife Cookie who served 17 years behind bars for money that started this business and their sons – I will not share any spoilers as I know there are still some of you Slow Simons who are yet to watch this show (by the way, do us both a favour and start watching).

I am a bonafide #CookieMonster  but according to this Buzzfeed quiz I’m more Anika. I can’t argue that I also do love Anika, for she throws her own form of palm trees, waving them ever so gently like a cool Caribbean breeze. Like when she described a debutante as a ho who can slice your throat without even disturbing her pearls! #BougieShade

This show has also grasped the art of social media and connecting with their fans in a way no other show prior to this had done (to my knowledge) – once the show airs on Wednesdays, by Thursday clips of the music videos from the show are available on YouTube, added to Spotify as well as available to order on iTunes. Details of Cookie’s wardrobe is shared after each episode as well on a blog dedicated to her style.

I will now stop rambling on and share with you some of the music from this great show.

Who is your favourite character and what has been your favourite moment so far? Also take the Buzzfeed quiz here and tell me which character you are

‘Hearts are meant to be broken’

Being Mary Jane Season 2 premiered last night here in the UK (yes we are about 5 episodes behind our US counterparts but do join us as we recap this brilliant show) and the theme for this season is Beautifully Flawed.

This episode aptly titled ‘People in Glass Houses Shouldn’t Throw Fish’ we start off with Mary Jane getting home, checking on and chatting with her gold fish and then in a millisecond Goldie (yes it is only right to name the gold fish) had been thrown out the window, shattering glass every where and was flipping for dear life. Could this be a sign of things to come in Mary Jane’s life this series? Mary Jane aka TGT aka The Goldfish Terminator  then hosts a dinner party with her friends where their discussions range from black culture, education, religion however when Mary Jane’s younger brother PJ voices his opinion, Mary Jane who actually was a rather belligerent drunk takes on to bash her brother in front of her friends to which PJ responds with stating this is the reason David is not with her and with the other woman.

PJ!! Ouchhh!!! Of course on that note party done. When Mary Jane wakes up in the morning we learn that probably due to the emotional stress and being drunk Mary Jane wet the bed.

We also see Niecy asking her aunty Mary Jane if she can come to stay with her and save her from the wrath of her grandmother Helen (Margaret Avery or the unforgettable Shug Avery from the Colour Purple) who at every minute loves to remind Niecy whose house she lives in. So we see a moment between auntie and niece and them getting along and Mary Jane offering to pay tuition fees for Niecy to pursue her nursing school education. In this we see Mary Jane as a caring and giving person who is there for her family.

On the work from we see Cara pitching  to Mary Jane that she freeze her eggs on live television and have the network foot the bill, Mary Jane actually stuns Cara with how she actually jumps at this without need much convincing or a prezi presentation.

Mary Jane then goes round to Chris and his wife’s home – they were introduced us earlier as having been David’s friends whom Mary Jane was now hanging out with for the sole purpose of wanting to find out more about David. Chris puts an end to it, by having David tell Mary Jane over the phone that he and his new girlfriend are expecting. When Mary Jane gets home she finds her brother and Niecy arguing and she opts out of this family drama and books herself into a hotel. She does invite David over and he comes by, and we learn that during the time that Mary Jane and David were still a couple before David was a silicon success story, Mary Jane had an abortion and Mary Jane thinks the reason nothing in her personal life seems to work out is because she is being punished for this choice. The two sort of fall into old habits but Mary Jane stops the canoodling fest by saying ‘That was supposed to be our baby’.

This premier episode was a great one. The 7 #ChaudTakeAways from this episode

1.

b. A high station in life is earned by the gallantry with which appalling experiences are survived with grace – Tennessee Williams

iii) ‘I need closure more than I need my pride’ – Mary Jane logic for going to an ex’s friends’ house to get the 411 on why he has moved on to some-one else.

d) Being tech savvy means having your techie ex on Google Alerts…who has had/ still has their entrepreneur bae on Google Alerts?

iv) Dipping into archive penis can be tricky on the heart

f) ‘I want the life that you have on Instagram’…’What I didn’t post was the fight that we had on the drive to your house’ = Instagram life is a LIAD!!

7) Hearts are meant to be broken.

Being Mary Jane will be showing Mondays 10.00pm GMT on Sky 187 / Virgin 184 / FREESAT 140

On behalf of all the women of colour in the UK I’d like to thank BET International and the show creator Mara Brock Akil for bringing Being Mary Jane to us, as we actually have ZERO shows like this. So thank you very much Mara, for creating a Beautifully Flawed Mary Jane Paul  with a beautifully flawed story to share which sums up not just Mary Jane Paul’s life but all our lives really – as  we are all beautifully flawed creatures. 

Working as Editor in Chief for Chaud has meant that I need to stay abreast with Social Media, Pop Culture, Technology and Fashion. There is a social media platform that ‘relaxes’ me and every night before I turn on my night lamp and go to sleep, I scroll through YouTube. I might have been studying EU law for three hours, after working 9am – 6pm, attended lectures from 6pm -9pm, been on my hour commute, gotten home, made some dinner and be extremely exhausted but believe me you, there is nay a shut eyelid without me watching at least 2 YouTube videos on my subscription list.

Here’s what I last watched over the last couple of days.

1.  How To Find A Husband

2.  Ciara – I Bet

3.  Scandal Cast at Paley Fest

4.  My Shameless Cinderella Story – Shameless Maya

5. Jussie Smollet ‘Good Enough’ on Ellen

6.  What Is Beauty – Darling Magazine

7.  Girls Talk London Chat Show

I have a dear friend who is turning 30 this year and we were having a conversation on G-chat and that is how the idea of this post came about. As a resident in land 3 decadeville, I feel I can now say how your mind shifts and what you realise in now having 3 decades of life on this here good earth.

1. You will look in the mirror and smile. You will love yourself and your flaws. You embrace your beauty. You are now a grown woman..you can do whatever, whenever, whomever, wherever you like

2.You will own your mistakes and hold yourself accountable to where you go wrong.

3. You literally stop giving a rat’s a** what anyone around you thinks about you, their opinions do not matter any more and you no longer need validation from anyone and I mean anyone.

4. You will say it with your chest. You will own your emotions, how you feel and you will let people know how you feel – that subliminal, passive aggressive behaviour seizes to be a part of your being.

5. You will lose friends. You actually cease and desist the whole ‘frenimies’ clique, it is now either your friends are for you or they are not.  You will also appreciate those close to you, you learn the different idiosyncrasies of your close friends and you learn to love them for that. You mightn’t talk to your close ones 24/7 but you fall right back into your friendship when you do.

6. Following onto 5, you learn to give your friends their own space in their new families, relationships, life adventures and journeys. You love them but also learn that space does not mean friendship is over.

7. You also learn to be there for your friends when they are going through something, you learn to stand up and be present when needed.

8. You will make some 25 years and below mistakes but the difference is now you actually just own it, you will judge yourself before anyone else will and you will keep it moving.

9. You will be much more hard on yourself with regards to the goals you did not achieve, but will equally ensure that you now pursue them.

10. You will learn that just because you are friends with people it does not equal them supporting you and you will be fine with it. On that note, you will also know that being friends is not the sole foundation to going into business with some-one.

11. You will not be scared to dine alone, take yourself out and spoil yourself. You will enjoy going discovering new places and holidays by yourself as much as you do with company.

12. You are not scared to voice what you expect from a partner , you know what you bring to the table and therefore either they roll with you or the hitch another ride.

13. You start buying more investment key pieces – Primark is fine for basics but you also learn that good quality staples last you longer. This is not just fashion biased, you will start owing Le Creuset in your kitchen and spend more time in the Home section of Selfridges, Zara and department stores.

14. You take advice with a grain of salt.

15. You will not voice your opinion at every given opportunity. There are times you will know some-one is actually not seeking your advice or validation.

16. Your parents become so precious and dear to you and you WILL have nightmares of when they are not here, so you will become a clingy adult child, worrying and fussing over them.

17.  Hangovers will hurt you real bad and will knock you back for daysss!

18. You will now be more dinner parties and games nights than bar hopping – you now like your drunk antics reserved for a select few.

19. You will judge some of fashions latest trends . Honestly why are the above jeans £55? Why Sway?

20. If you are not married and have children – your marital status and ovaries will be everyone’s concern.

21. You will catch yourself becoming your mother, in the things you say as well as randomly do.

22. Your home will be your sanctuary – as you will love your bonding time with your home. You will refuse to be disrespected in your own home.

24. You body will start hurting a little bit more after working out.

25. On working out, you will realise your metabolism is not what it used to be, so you will take better care of your body and exercise.

26. ‘What will my legacy be’ – will be one of the constant questions you ask yourself.

27. For the ladies – your sex drive PEAKS!

28. You are probably going to be Godparent to a few kids and will take this role much more seriously.

29. If you don’t want to go out, you will actually say no and not give a reason other than you just do not feel like it.

30. This will be the best decade of your life as you get to know you, embrace you and come to center with yourself!

So what do you say?What have you learned on this life journey about you?

Coming to BWNG TV on March 18^th is HouseMates, a series of short situational episodes following a close group of five twenty-something girls living together. Be prepared to join Mya, Chenayi, Jade, Zara and Michelle, as they take you through the mundane but funny reality of living with your friends.

Created and directed by Monique Needham, HouseMates was inspired by Monique’s real-life experiences. This ‘Friends’ meets ‘Girlfriends’ docu-drama, gives insight into the special bond of female friendship, through its individual characters.

Monique teamed up with the BWNG TV team following the HouseMates tasters that were released in early 2014.  These will be re-released on the channel along with the four brand new episodes on March 18^th 2015(yes this Wednesday). This collaboration was a right fit for both, as they felt that BWNG audience would appreciate the content and it would also reach a larger audience, both locally and internationally.

Talking about what she hopes the viewers get from watching HouseMates, Monique says ‘I hope viewers are able to enjoy and gain insight as well as relate to having had had housemates/roommates as some point in our lives. I hope they are able to relate to the scenarios, enjoy the characters and their interactions’

Talking about her inspiration for HouseMates, Monique says “it’s shows like with characters like this that is missing from mainstream television. I want to show characters that reflect my world, I want to see characters I relate to and I’m bored of having to watch American shows to find them.”

“I wanted to portray strong friendships between women because I believe that many people who watch have an element of these characters in their circles.”

HouseMates will have four situational episodes as well as bonus minisodes which will show the exciting mayhem that occurs with these girls in their house. With HouseMates providing an original spin on the modern day female, and the occasional disagreement, be prepared for a rollercoaster of addictive entertainment.

You’ll be able to join in on the big #HouseMates conversation on Twitter, where the cast will be giving you more insight into who they are.

The Cast

Mya, is the melodramtic housemate. Her fellow housemates would describe her as drama queen who is addicted to her phone.

Follow Mya on Twitter @ImMyaHM

Chenayi is the quirky housemate, when she’s not busy being loud, she is totally engrossed with technology.

Follow Chenayi on Twitter @MissChenayiHM

 
Jade is the opinionated housemate, she is the housemate most likely to be honest and tell you that your bum looks big in that outfit.

Follow Jade on Twitter @ItsJadeHM

Zara, is the feisty housemate that will catch you red-handed doing something naughty, and will never let you live it down.

Follow Zara on Twitter @MissZaraHM

Michelle is the scatty housemate of the group, she means well but always get the girls in sticky situations.

Follow Michelle on Twitter @MichMichHM

4 Episodes and 4 Minisodes will be shown, with the first minisode having been shown on Sunday, yesterday. The premier episode will be this Wednesday 18th March 2015. I together with the HouseMates Girls and creator will all be live-tweeting so be sure to join us and be sure to watch this show!

Twitter:@HouseMatesGirls

YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/brotherswithnogame

      Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HouseMatesGirls

Twitter: https://twitter.com/housematesgirls

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/HouseMatesGirls

We now sadly live in a world where the number of followers matter more than the content, where the number of views or virality impact matter the most – before brands work with they have a minimum 1k Twitter follower reach cap,30k views on YouTube before checking on the content you’re putting out. However true content creators who do it for the art, who love the art, focus on their content regardless of their reach and let their passion do the talking and they stay consistent to their brand and what they are putting out. With all that being said, I have decided to share with you 5 CHAUD content as well as content creators you need to know, follow and just applaud.

1. Janelle Monae – Yoga

I have a special place in my heart for Janelle Monae, all that she stands for and her style. Yoga is such a great song, it is all about acceptance of self, loving who you are and also ‘get off my areola’ is added to my growing arsenal of grown bougie come-backs which include ‘go have coitus with yourself’  directed to those who sometimes deserve this.

2. Abi

I love Abi’s Instagram and her blog Bids In Graceland, she is so consistent, has a great eye for Fashion which is always inspiring me and her blogs are always informative and detailed.

3. Toyaberry

Chaud and YouTube are like peanut butter and jelly – we go together. I actually have allocated ‘YouTube Days’ where I’ll spend the day on the YT, and this also has a rabbit hole experience and sometimes this experience leads me to find channels like Toya’s that I then become obsessed with because of her fashion sense and how well she edits her videos! She also has an awesome blog http://champagneandstilettos.com/

4. Vanessa Sanyauke

Another YouTube rabbit hole discovery, I came across a great talkshow created and co-hosted by Vanessa (fellow Zim chick too) called Girls Talk London, they talk about pop culture, beauty, lifestyle, fashion and everything else in between – this show needs to be on our televison screens, spice up our daytime television chat shows.

5. Wale – The Body

I have always made it known that me and Wale Folarin go together! He’s a fellow Virgo so I get Wale and I am a super fan of his. It was through Wale that I discovered Chrisette Michele and for that I’m eternally grateful to Wale, but not only that I enjoy his art and the delivery of his message. This video should have more than the 4 million views because a song titled The Body by a rapper, but has a fully clothed lead girl in it deserves more views just for that alone!

 Social Butterfly

Website: http://www.girlstalklondon.com/

Youtube: Girls Talk London

Twitter: @GirlsTalkLondon

Twitter: @VanessaSanyauke 

Images Credit: Courtesy Vanessa Sanyauke

Going on a series of bad first dates can really get you down, if you let it. I remember all too well that sinking feel, where you get in a downward spiral wondering what’s wrong with you and asking yourself why oh why can’t you meet someone awesome right this minute and put an end to the misery of dating.  If you read my previous article for Chaud, 10 things to do besides complain about online dating, you know that I‘m not going to allow you to sit around and wallow. Instead I’m going to share the 5 things I learned from going on bad first dates which will help you take charge of your dating life with renewed confidence and sass.

1. Limit yourself to 90 minutes

If you’re dating someone that you don’t know very well, then set a time limit on that date up front so that you can make your excuses and leave without hurting feelings.  Life is too short to spend time sitting through uncomfortable dates. Of course, if you hit it off straightaway, you can fess up that you don’t really have to leave by 9pm for that early start tomorrow!

2. Avoid dinner do something fun instead

I remember that first time I went out for dinner on a first date and realising before the starter had even arrived that I absolutely didn’t want to be there for the rest of the night. Sitting through the rest of that meal was painful and pointless and I vowed it would be the last time I’d agree to meet someone I’d never met before in person for dinner. A quick post work drink is great for those first dates to see if you have enough in common and enough chemistry to go for a second date. Or you could choose to do something together that’s going on in your area like head to a local pub to see a live band, go to a street food festival or challenge them to a game of ping pong or snooker. This should help break the ice, making it easier to connect with someone and if the chemistry isn’t there at least you’ll have had a bit of a laugh.

3. Manage your expectations

Don’t have high expectations for a first date if you haven’t met them in person before. Chemistry, as I’m sure you’ve realised, is a mysterious thing and you can’t tell if you’re going to have chemistry with someone until you meet them. A date where two people like each other (more or less) the same amount is a fantastic outcome but not always the likeliest one. Get comfortable with the fact that dates don’t always go well and that’s OK. It’s certainly not worth getting down about. Dating is meant to be fun. If the fun stops, then it’s time to move on with no regrets.

4. It’s not always about you

Sometimes dates just don’t work because people have so much going on in their lives outside of the dating bubble. They might seem like the best ever fit for you but they’re not giving you much in return and you can’t understand why. Just be aware it’s probably nothing to do with you and everything to do with the horrible boss they’re facing every day or the fact that their dad is unwell or their flatmate has just moved out. Timing is a big factor in why even the best relationships don’t work and there is nothing you can do. It’s out of your control. All you can do is make sure you don’t blame yourself for things not working out and just keep moving forwards with a smile and a positive attitude.

5. Act with integrity

Going on bad first dates can take its toll, after all there can be lots of rejection flying around. Maybe they don’t want to see you again, or maybe it’s your call. But as long as you act with integrity at all times, respecting other people’s feelings as well as your own, then you’re more likely to minimise the pain on all sides.

Now go out there and get some first dates in the diary. Keep them short, sweet and fun. Shake off the ones that aren’t working so you can focus on finding someone to date who is fun.

Saskia Nelson is the talent behind the award-winning and  internationally acclaimed Saturday Night’s Alright, the UK’s coolest dating photography business, specialising in creating dating photos that kick ass and win dates.    

She also puts her extensive online dating experiences to good use by sharing her experiences and wisdom on her blog and by organising dating workshops that focus on helping people create irresistible dating profiles.

You can find her living it up here on twitter

www.twitter.com/satnightalright and here on facebook www.facebook.com/saturdaynightsalright

Photo Credit: Saskia Nelson

Very few times does an Award show leave a stamp on my mind. Yes there have been speeches that have moved me to tears but there is something so poignant about the Emmys 2015.

Viola Davis made history as the first black actress to win the Best Actress in a Drama Series for her role as lawyer Annaliese (Anna Mae to her mama) Keating in How To Get Away With Murder. She opened her speech by quoting Harriet Tubman, she went further  to challenge the creators out there, to create roles like the ones Shonda is creating of smart, brilliant, career driven, bosses in their own rights for black women because darn it there is a plethora of us out there making it. She also made sure to shout out all the leading black actresses that are on our screens – Gabrielle Union, Kerry Washington, Meagan Good, Nicole Beharie, Taraji P. Henson – all shows I watch one because they’re great and most importantly because of this loyalty I have, this loyalty that comes from having melanin and wanting those show to stay on air, because little brown girls growing up the world over need to see faces that are like them on their screens.

The sense of sisterhood, the sense of pride, ‘Umoja’ ( Swahili for unity or the spirit of togetherness ) emanated through and could be felt when watching Taraji.

Taraji’s reactions to her girls winning  touched a part of me because she was here for her crew, the gasp she made, and that loud ecstatic ‘Yess’ she when her girl Regina King won. Even though she was nominated in the same category as Viola, when Viola won she got up from her seat, kissed her girl and clapped with a face full of pride. Kerry Washington was in tears as Viola gave the most emotive monumental speech .

Watching these women crying because their peer had won, instead of being in a ‘it-should-have-been-me’ state of mind. That show of sisterhood we saw, wasn’t isolated to the Emmy’s it was a message that echoed world over, letting black women everywhere around the globe know that we can cheer for each other, we can root louder for our fellow sister because we are united in this. Knowing that your girls are rooting for, they are cheering for you because your win is in as much as a collective win is such a great motivator, such a great show of Umoja, and a message to say

‘We are in this together, we go through the struggle together and we win together’.

I have to say the Black Hollywood actresses should all have a picture right next to Umoja – these women cheer each other from Ava cheering Shonda on Thursdays, to Shonda shouting out Mara Brock Akil on Tuesdays when Being Mary Jane is on our screens to Gabrielle Union shouting out Sanaa Lathan’s latest movie – all standing together, letting the world know ‘A team is us’.

This advert was also another memorable highlight. It was created by the Apple Music team who are led by Bozoma Saint John (to those who are unaware, Bozoma is the Head of Global Consumer Marketing at Apple Music), it was directed by Ava Du Vernay (I have already shared my admiration for Ava and adore all her work) and it starred Mary J. Blige, Taraji P. Henson and Kerry Washington.  Just knowing that alone, that engine behind the pulling together of this advert was a message in itself.

To every woman out there, be the Taraji P. Henson of your peers, yes you’re making waves on your own but do not discredit the work done by your peers, be genuinely happy and applaud them when they win, for in so doing you discredit that whole ‘crabs in barrel’ mentality. To genuinely share  and bask in another’s win does not subtract anything from your work, it actually adds more  shine on the awesomeness of your essence. So go forth and be the Taraji of your peers, friends and circle and stand up and cheer unapologetically for that black girl that rocks!

To every woman out there, be the Taraji P. Henson of your peers

Unrelated Addendum:  Taraji P. Henson is a Virgo 

Image Credit: Instagram, Google Images

Fall/ Autumn Lookbook 

So Kim aka @ChicNatural is my fashion spirit animal. I actually just go to her videos on days I need some fashion inspiration and as our season have transitioned to autumn this is a great inspirational video.

Chrisette Michele Acoustic Session

Apollo and Minerva wept. Chrisette is one celebrity who has mastered how to connect with her niche rich hipster nation via social media.  To have the experience of peeking in on an acoustic session with her and Ashleigh? A great gift. I have had the great pleasure of having a live Chrisette Michele performance experience more than once and will gladly purchase my tickets whenever she is in London.Tamar Braxton, Loni Love, Adrienne Bailon, Jeannie Mai and Tamera Mowry-Housley

The Real

I’m a fan of “The Real”, which is a talk show featuring five outspoken female hosts,Tamar Braxton, Loni Love, Adrienne Bailon, Jeannie Mai and Tamera Mowry-Housley who are all going through varied life experiences that include motherhood, marriage, breakups and experiencing the single life. They all bring their unique perspectives to topics ranging from the pop culture to beauty, fashion, relationships and their own personal lives.   In the above clip they discuss how long should the horizontal mambo aka sex be: Discuss.

Skinny Girl In Transit

Hilarious, entertaining, African parents are just a few words I would throw about when describing Nigerian web series Skinny Girl In Transit which follows  on how she navigates her weight loss journey with relationships, career and family.

Black Bear

Ted E. Bear was busy bear-ing, scoping his natural habitat going for a leisurely walk cooling off after an argument with the missus when a human messed up his day.  He was deep in thought, coming up with all the clever ish he could have said during that argument when all of a sudden he heard loud screeching sounds telling him to go away. See Bear is bi-lingual understanding both Bearnese and English.  He was confused how some-one would come into his homeland and then tell him to go away and leave. He’d read about colonisation before, but never did he think he would experience it like this. Now Ted E. Bear is petty especially when provocked, once that pepper spray hit him, his Petty Wap light came on. He headed to her kayak and decided that even though he actually didn’t eat kayaks today was the day he was going to sharpen his teeth with it. As he ripped through the kayak, the woman screeched, Bear got excited of how he was going to tell this story to Paddington and Ruxpin.

1. Hello – Adele

Guess whose back and has us excited? Adele!! It’s cuffing season, short days and long nights season, Yuletide season, Ice skating at the Tate season and most of all it is Adele season. Adele dropped her single ‘Hello’ as well as the visual treatment for it too featuring the guy from The Wire and Bootleg Beverley Hills 90210.

Editor’s Note: I enjoy the song but not in a pining over lost love kind of way but my introspective self sees at me talking to my younger self and also friend that I lost touch with because life happened. I only got into 21 a year or so later because I just was not about the hype (have I ever told you of the time I actually followed the hype and bought Frank Ocean’s album only to wallow in the land of regret and disappointment because if that album were food it would taste like dried bread seasoned with baobab powder). I however am looking forward to Adele’s 25.

2. Hotline Bling – Drake

Drake dropped the visuals for the song where he’s obsessing over an ex who has clearly moved and won’t call him. Drake’s dance moves in this video have led to the creation of one of the best memes of 2015  #DrakeAlwaysOnBeat as well as mash ups – every time this happens we are always in awe of the plethora of talented geniuses who create these memes.

Addendum: Drake and Adele are topping the charts with songs if taken at face value are about folks clearly obsessed with their exes who neither care to call nor pick up the phone and with both songs topping the charts it does highlight how today’s society could very well be people obsessed with their exes too.

3. How Did We Get Here – Brothers With No Game

Brothers With No Game are Chaud’s brothers, we are family. And so when this new show dropped on a Sunday after midnite, it was only right to watch every episode and live tweet it. This is beautifully written, well shot, the acting is great everything about this is seamless. We highly recommend everyone to watch this show and show some love to our Brothers!

4. Icebreaker – Bronze Goddess01

When in need of some food for your soul!

5. Shumba Beta

Vimbai – a friend of Chaud introduced us to these young women. Funny, creative and definitely lots of potential to go far! This video does definitely take us on memory lane from cutting it up on the club dance floors to childhood memories of when URTNA would play Zawalenga just before 3.00pm when afternoon television started aka cartoon time! Highly recommend you subscribe to their channel.

Recently engaged and infectiously happy Chrisette Michele has dropped a song off her anticipated album Milestone.  “STEADY” speaks of the 10 year run in the music industry with labels Def Jam and Motown, and now her very own imprint, Rich Hipster signed to Capitol/Caroline records. With the new found freedom of running her own record label, Chrisette releases her first Trap Soul record. Chrisette has shared with her #RichHipster nation that she loves trap soul artists like SZA and Jhene Aiko and is also a fan of pure trap. She even shared a bit about the proposal..it was at dusk, on the roof top of her favourite studio in New York City, you could see the Empire State Building in the skyline

She makes reference to the Porsche she’s seen driving off the set of her reality TV show “R&B Divas LA” and the re-kindled relationship between herself and Four Kings CEO Doug “Biggs” Ellison. The track is produced by Blckie Blaze of Four Kings Productions. This track shows is about flicking that diamond adorned wrist, it’s about being a boss, it’s about acknowledging ‘I gots this boo’. It is a bit reminiscent of  ‘So in Love’, ‘Aston Martin’ Chrisette.

“I’m ready to play. I miss being a choreographer. I miss my leather pants. I miss being excited. I love my ballads and there will be some in this new album, Milestone, but it’s time to let my hair down and step outside of the box. I can’t wait to share.” Chrisette Michele

As another self-confessed sophsti-ratchet trap music loving fan (shoutout Fetty, 2 Chainz, SZA) I am loving Steady. I had STEADY on repeat when I went on my morning run today and boy did it keep me motivated! Once more congratulations O Captain! Our Captain! Chris on your engagement and the #RichHipsterNation is so ready for Milestone! Thank you for the music you gift us!

Social Butterfly: To stay abreast with Chrisette’s project follow her on Social Media – especially Periscope and Snapchat as you’re likely to get studio exclusives there.

Periscope: @ChrisetteM

Snapchat: @chrisettem

Instagram: @chrisettemichele

YouTube: ChrisetteMichele

Photo Credit : Chrisette Michele

Firstly, how has your 2016 been so far? It is now near the end of January and in pop culture world it has already started at Magnitude 9 on the Pettiness Richter scale, however we are not here to indulge the #BlacRob, Meek Mill vs 50 Cent, Kanye vs Wiz or B.O.B telling us the world is flat which resulted in Neil deGrasse Tyson dropping a scientific diss track, or R.Kelly saying he was in love with his mum..whew this petty is way too much for January! Let us shift focus and share with you our favourite videos from the month of Januar

1. An African City

2.  James Corden Carpool Karaoke

James Corden is my thickums bae way from the great show Gavin & Stacey and then when he moved to the U.S. to take over the Late Late Show we all rooted behind him and his carpool karaoke videos with great stars like Adele, Jennifer Hudson, Justin Beiber, Stevie Wonder, Rod Stewart  have all gone viral – now waiting on him to do one with Beyonce – that will break the internet too right? James can hold a note!

3. Oprah Winfrey’s Top 10 Rules for Success

Mama O is the oracle, and came across this video at the beginning of the year and these are great tips to follow through this year whilst working on making those goals set for 2016 into a reality.

4. Liane La Havas – Unstoppable

If music be the food of love then play on! If you have not taken the time out to listen to this great songstress, then do your Spotify/iTunes a huge service and download her music.

5. Becoming Mrs Ellison

Grammy winning artist Chrisette Michele (soon to be Mrs Ellison) is taking her #SteadyGang behind the scenes on her journey of being an artist, fiance, vegan and all in all just her with this new vlog series where you get a glimpse into her life, the highs, the lows (being hurt whilst on stage performing), celebrating her birthday and more. New episodes drop every Friday morning and so be sure to subscribe to her Youtube Channel here